| Judgmentalism |
 One who is judgmental is, in effect, setting
himself up to play God. Judgmental people believe that they have the only,
and the "right" answer or approach. The feelings or desires of the other person
are not important. Energy is spent in spelling out "shoulds" and
"rights." Actually, these are usually attempts to convince others to do
things my way. The focus is on the other person and little effort is
expended in evaluating one's own real feelings.Judgmentalism usually stirs up angry or defensive feelings in the other person. Once these feelings take hold, the original thoughts are not heard because of the struggle to reduce the negative feelings. Acceptance (one of the higher levels of conscious thinking), on the other hand prevents the destructive negative feelings and permits a constructive solution to the problem. One must remember that "acceptance" does not mean agreement, but merely the right of the other person to have an opinion or feelings about something. These concepts are discussed and the consequences described on Dr. Botten's book, "Creative Happiness." |
| Click the "Get the Book" link at left to download "Creative Happiness" |